• The Corsettes
• Cast

Current

Derri A Galore was a premier diva, wanted by all the finest opera houses in the world. She was also wanted by most of the composers, the conductors, the entirety of the orchestra pit, and more than a few youthful stagehands. She is thought to have inspired some of the finest operas in the world, including The Lady and the Stablehands, Madame Pulchritude's Holiday, and even the famous Mexican opera, The Cinco Bajingos. In fact, it was during the European tour for The Cinco Bajingos that there was a particular incident at the famous La Scala opera house involving Derri, a stagehand, two conductors, and the rather artful and ingenious use of a trombone. The scandal that followed rocked the classical world and Derri found herself quite unable to withstand the constant presence of the paparazzi. She went into seclusion, along with her two favorite stagehands (and the trombone), until she was tracked down by Regina Monologue. Ms. Monologue's offer of both singing roles and stagehands proved too tempting for Derri, who happily left opera for burlesque. "Burlesque has better stagehands," she says, "who know just how to treat their instruments."

Evie Apple grew up as the daughter of a preacher in a sleepy little town called Paradise. Her parents tried to teach sweet little Evie how to be virtuous, but their fruit fell far from the tree. When a traveling circus came through town, oh-so-innocent Evie found herself entranced by a handsome young snake charmer. She quickly learned her way around his serpent, and he invited her to join his act. One summer night soon after, Regina had the opportunity to visit the circus. Impressed by Evie's seductive snake handling and crowd-pleasing wholesomeness, Regina invited her to join the Corsettes. Evie agreed immediately. Like the first woman, she had discovered how delicious forbidden fruit could taste - and how wonderful it was to share. "Am I a bad girl?" says Evie with a pout. "Perhaps. But I certainly feel very good."

Little is known about the enigmatic Regina Monologue, but three things are certain: she knows how to walk in high heels, she's never met a microphone she didn't like, and while she's not much of a baker, she has been known to whip up a hell of a beefcake. Rumor has it that she started life as the smart, bookish daughter of a romance novelist (it paid the bills) and an English teacher (it didn't). Regina eventually took on a fledgling career as a reference librarian, and when a donation of vintage film reels arrived one day and she began the cataloging, her life was forever changed. She was fascinated by the brassy dancers of the 1940s and wanted to bring a modern sensibility to the genre. So, between two rarely visited shelves of reference materials, she began to hone her act with the help of a few eager library patrons. But when her fanbase swelled to the point that it would no longer fit between the farmer's almanacs and the veterinary manuals, she was discovered by her boss, who fired her on the spot and then immediately proposed. Regina declined his hand in marriage, but a private performance in his office convinced him to keep her on the payroll while she pursued her true calling. With her newfound free time and ample stipend, she traveled the globe to find the ladies—and the lucky man—who would become her Corsettes. Along the way, she developed a taste for martinis and a few other things that are often prefaced with "dirty." "I've always thought men should be more like martini olives," she says. "A little salty, a little sharp, and meaty enough to make a meal out of them."

Robert Fitzpurrfeckleigh was an eager and innocent young gynecology resident when, one fateful night, he chanced upon a Corsettes performance. Struck at once by the grace and beauty of the ladies—and perhaps the influence of a pitcher of martinis—he immediately abandoned the teaching hospital, wishing to be responsible for the health and well-being of these ladies, exclusively. He remains eager. If not quite so innocent.

Members Emeritus

Bunny Foufou

Bebe Smith-Colt-Howitzer-Winchester-Rattatat-Gunn

Ophelia Balzac